Lydia and I had a longer walk today than yesterday, showing signs that my cold is getting better, and resting up is helping.
Gone are the days when I was working and had to push on, often leading to further complications such as coughs and chest infections.
I’ve rested up most of the rest of the day and then made tea for Trev and I, including pasta with a stir-in sauce and toasted red peppers. It was tasty and made a change.
Lydia has been my constant companion throughout the day. She didn’t even want to go outside after she’d had her breakfast like she usually does, although she did have a bit of outside time this afternoon, barking at whatever she thought she needed to bark at.
She lifted me from a negative state of mind to a more positive one, just by being herself and being with me.
We had a lovely walk, coffee and snacks then headed for lunch.
It was quite a busy place. Mandy bought food and I bought drinks.
I’ve been struggling with a lot of things but Mandy helped me to feel confident that I can get through to the other side, or at least keep going, even if the other side is a bit of a way off.
We’ve known each for a long time, Mandy and me, from when we first worked together,, about 40 years ago. I wanted her to be my friend then and am so glad she is now.
Lydia and I had an early walk, so that I could catch the train to meet Mandy. I think she’s had a good day too, and now it’s time for her tea.
I had a walk on the beach today, just before lunch, a short walk from the Manjushri Kadampa Meditation Centre.
The teaching yesterday evening was inspirational, the buffet supper was delicious, and the opportunity to chant in the New Year in the company of others in the Temple was so welcome. We could hear fireworks going off outside just as we reached a quiet part of the prayer ceremony, almost as if it had been planned.
This morning – after a good sleep – I enjoyed a sociable breakfast, followed by more chanting, and a delicious – and also sociable – lunch after my walk.
Though still not in the most positive frame of mind I’ve ever been in – and I continue to attribute this to being tired as much as anything else – I now have a reminder of what I can do to have a ‘Happy New Year’: develop and maintain a calm and peaceful mind. I will keep working on it, day by day, step by step. It’s good to get clear direction; all I have to do now is follow it.
I woke up to a different – and rather wonderful – view this morning, after staying overnight with friends.
Their dog – Faith – slept most of the night on my bed. Lydia hasn’t yet ever slept on my bed and if that’s her choice that’s fine, but I would like to think that she knows she can if she wants to.
Back home, I made some vegan and some meat sausage rolls for the Qigong fuddle we’re having tomorrow evening.
I’m beginning to feel reasonably well organised for Christmas, partly because I’m not cooking a Christmas dinner this year so there’s less for me to organise, and partly because I’ve now bought all the presents I wanted to buy, have posted all the cards I need to post and written most of the others. It’s good to feel that I can just enjoy what I’m doing every day which tomorrow will start with picking Lydia up from the boarding kennels. It’s just not the same here without her.
As I have now completed my latest cycle of writing for 28 days, I’ll be republishing earlier posts for the next couple of weeks, and then I’ll be back on the other side of Christmas.
Lydia has had a good rest this afternoon after a longish walk this morning.
I pushed her a bit, to go a bit further than she wanted to, although it was an easy walk for both of us really. Just over an hour on flat ground.
I’m tired too, though recognise I still need to push myself a bit as well. I’m tired but still not able to fully relax into the deep sleep that I need.
We had some over-ripe bananas so I made banana cake, with the addition of linseed, chia seeds, pumpkin seeds, all-spice and ground ginger. I used my standard cake recipe – 4oz butter/margarine, 4oz sugar, 4oz flour and 2 eggs, x 3, although I used less sugar to allow for the sweetness of the bananas. I also added some rolled oats. It turned out well. Baked in two loaf tins at 180 degrees centigrade, initially for about 20 minutes, then turned down and baked for a bit longer, until they passed the skewer test, coming out clean so I knew they were done.
As usual, Lydia has been keeping me good company on a quiet rainy day.
She hasn’t had her tea yet but doesn’t seem in any hurry for it. Neither am I for mine.
After a morning walk with Lydia, I spent an afternoon at the studio, doing some further work on pots I started a while ago.
It’s a slow process for me, but a good one.
It was good too to be in the company of people that I haven’t been in the company of for a while.
The studio shutters were up and the rain belted down at times. It felt a bit like being in a tent when it’s raining, a sensation I’ve always loved, providing the tent itself isn’t leaking.
Before the studio session, I picked up some pots from Imogen who had fired them for me. I’m particularly pleased with two bowls that were a bit experimental in terms of finish. Experiments do sometimes pay off.
Coming home, I give Lydia her tea – hand-fed as always. She loves it, especially finishing with a raw chicken wing, followed by a dental stick. Her teeth are in really good condition I’m pleased to say.
Trev brings home fish and chips. I have mine with curry sauce.
It’s a mellow evening as we move from summer to autumn. Who knows what tomorrow may bring?
As this 28-day cycle of journaling/blogging comes to a close, I reflect on how far I’ve come in being able to make the most of every day as I do, after the journey of mental health breakdown and recovery that I’ve had, for most of my so far 69 years.
I’m now going to have a short break from writing while I put together a two-volume book of the story of Lydia and me so far. While I’m doing this, I will re-post a blog from the past every day.
A full collection of my earlier blogs, from March 2020 to September 2024, is now available on Amazon for Kindle:
‘Rules’ came originally from a set of ‘self-management rules’ that I devised, largely to reflect on some of the very negative experiences I’d had of being managed by others. I later developed these Rules into ‘Poetry Rules’, relating them to poems that I wrote or had previously written.
‘Rhymes’ are my poems, even though not all my poems rhyme. I just like writing them, expressing myself through words in whatever way I choose.
‘Recovery’ pieces reflect on different approaches and factors that influence mental health and wellbeing, including barriers to recovery.
‘Recipe’ is largely focused on one dish, but it’s an important one: Leftovers Soup.
‘Random’ – well, anything that didn’t quite fit in to the other categories but wanted to include anyway.
Step by step, day by day, the story of Lydia and me continues, and I’ll continue to record it at https://gladabout.life/.
As I write, my beautiful girl is crunching her way through a dental chew.
The chew is bone shaped. I did quite a lot of internet searching to find out about different brands, and this is one of the brands that got the best reviews. She has good teeth, and I want to help her to look after them.
I’ve struggled a bit with looking after my own teeth in the past.
I previously wrote a blog post about this, and about other aspects of self-care within the context of mental distress:
At that time, there was a mental health update strategy in progress with a claim that mental health would be included in an overall ‘major conditions’ strategy that will focus on ‘whole-person care’.
There is now a Policy paper ‘Major conditions strategy: case for change and our strategic framework’ (Updated 21 August 2023) that includes common mental health conditions and severe mental illness (SMI).
There is some reassurance in the reference to reducing risks earlier in life, and it is also noted that:
“… access to physical healthcare is particularly important for people with SMI. The NHS LTP sets out a transformation programme to develop integrated models of care and holistic support closer to home. The major conditions strategy will outline how to do more to implement physical health support across mental health pathways.”
So, there’s a long way to go but at least there does seem to be some movement in the right direction, hopefully for future generations and hopefully for some people sooner than that.
In the here and now, I continue with my own strategy to manage my health and wellbeing, relying on only minimal, but still welcome, support from the system in the form of anti-depressant medication.
However, I do have access to other forms of support, that make all the difference to me in the context of my life. These take human and canine form. They are, of course, my friends, including Lydia.
With her, I am out every day, walking, enjoying fresh air and steady exercise. I have, with her, companionship and company. Good company.
My friends are amazing – they are rallying for me at a time when I am struggling emotionally.
I am still struggling with anger; have just come back from a Buddhist prayer session; have just spoken to a friend on the phone; am writing this. It all helps; having positive outlets for energy and emotions helps. I didn’t have this when I was younger, but I do now.
“I choose to be peaceful and calm. Everything is unfolding as it should.”
Glad About 
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